There are times in life that it seems you can’t get anywhere from being so busy. You work everyday, but you just don’t seem to accomplish any one thing completely? This wasn’t how it used to be…not when I was in my 20′s anyway. I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that my brain is now 43 yrs, 11 mths, 19 days old? It could. I even went on the WWW and found that I am supposed to be more addled than I use to be. Well, I have permission to be just that I guess…but I don’t like it and I don’t want to accept it.
I mean…is it really ok to forget that you drove out to one of the lakes the day before and swear that you didn’t, you KNOW you didn’t…until your husband shows you a picture that his “trail camera” took of you, in your vehicle, headed to the lake (the ONLY thing down that path). Yep, there I was…driving right on past it, and I STILL couldn’t remember going there! For some folks that may be OK and normal…but not for me. I even cried about it…and I racked my brain for the memory…but to this very moment I can’t remember doing that. I like to think I was talking to God and therefore not paying a lot of attention to where I was driving. I PRAY that is what it was anyway!
My brain gets tired much easier, my eyes start blurring before midnight rolls around, and my bones ache when I get up from my computer. Yes, I am getting older, and so is the rest of the world. Each day brings a new change (or at least I think it does?). There was this pivotal moment for me when I realized I was no spring chicken any longer. Let me tell you…it hurt my feelings worse than anything has in a long time! I was photographing a senior in Washington State and he was on his dirt bike. I wanted to get a higher angle so I decided to jump into the back of his truck. Well…I couldn’t jump up there. He was waiting on me, and watching me of course…so I grabbed a hold of the side of the truck to pull myself up onto the tail gate…total embarrassment…I couldn’t do that either! I then tried to slide my bottom onto the tail gate, but it was too high! Yes the truck was jacked up about 6 inches…but come on…I shoulda been able to get up there with no problem. THAT was my pivotal moment! I knew then that things were about to take a HUGE decline in my physical body. I was 40 years old when that happened…and man on man was I right on the decline issue! That year I also had to have bi-focals and I started to say ‘huh?’ a lot more too.
So…I guess according to the world and everyone in it…I am normal and it is ok to not remember everything, but I DON”T LIKE IT! Maybe this is the reason for the feeling of being overwhelmed. Because you see…I don’t get near as much accomplished each day, and I do get side tracked a lot! I wonder if there is anything called Old Person Onset of ADD? I need to look into that I do believe!
I will show you all an image of this young man who was present at my PIVOTAL MOMENT. Here is Alex.